I’ve been with my husband for nearly 10 years and we have a good marriage, but I think I’ve ruined everything in a moment of madness....CONTINUE READING
My husband has this friend, who he’s known since they were teenagers, who’s a nice guy, but a bit of a player and always flits from girlfriend to girlfriend.
My husband has been working away a lot, which is something we argue over because I didn’t want him to take the job, knowing there was lots of travel involved.
Anyway, a couple of weeks ago, I went to a pub quiz with a group of our friends, including this guy. He gave me a lift home and, stupidly, I invited him in for a coffee and offered him a glass of wine, saying he could call a taxi to get home.
Well, he never called the taxi, one bottle of wine turned into two and, you can guess where I’m going with this, we ended up in bed.
The next day, both of us were full of remorse and promised we wouldn’t say anything to anyone about it. If I’m honest, I enjoyed the sex, but I do regret it and every time I get a flashback from the night, I panic.
I’ve never cheated on my husband before – or with anyone else for that matter. I love my husband and don’t know what to do for the best.
I’m pretty sure if he found out it would be the end of us or, at the very least, it would be the end of his friendship with this guy and would cause lots of problems for our friends.
I feels so bad – what should I do?
You obviously resent the fact your husband took this job and perhaps feel a bit lonely and neglected because he’s away. Possibly this is at the root of your “moment of madness”.
Also, when you’ve been with someone a long time, of course it’s flattering to know you’re still attractive to other people, but that should be enough for you. The question is, can you carry on living with this secret and the guilt?
Even if you could, are you sure you can trust this man to keep it to himself ?
I suppose if I were in your shoes, I’d have to come clean and take my chances, even if I thought it might mean the end of my marriage.
But you have to do what feels right for you. If you do tell your husband, the hope would be that once the dust has settled, he’ll realise this guy isn’t much of a friend and he doesn’t want to walk away from everything you’ve built together over the past 10 years.
It is possible to come back from with a lot of talking and maybe counselling, but it won’t be easy and it’ll take time to rebuild trust.
Either way, you have to tackle this long-distance arrangement because it’s clearly not working for you. And your husband needs to figure out what’s more important in the long term – his marriage or the job…CONTINUE READING>>
