A great relationship isn’t just built upon how you feel about your partner, it also matters how you feel about yourself when you’re with them....CONTINUE READING>>
Therightpartner will show you thathealthy loveenhances your life, not complicates it. Before we dive in, let me clarify what I mean by “the one,” because I actuallydon’t believein this concept in the traditional sense.
That’s right! “The love guy” doesn’t think “the one” exists. Hear me out…
I believe that love is a conscious and intentional choice that two people make every single day. Yes, there is deep- rooted emotion. Yes, there are strong feelings. No, you don’t choose who you love…
Butthe act of love as a verb is very much a choice. Thedecisionto commit to someone, to be monogamous, to build a life, to compromise, to put in daily effort, to be “their person,” thatis a choice.
You choose your “one,” and they choose you. Through their actions and their expressions of love, you’ll have feelings and realizations that reinforce your decision to give them your heart, and to receive theirs in return.
I’ve been having this conversation recently with a private client, as he’s been developing feelings of love for someone he’s dating.“How do I know if it’s really love?”
H ere are 10 things you’ll feel in the right relationship:
Your value as a human comes from within, butfeelingvalued in a relationship is a different story. When someone truly values you, you’ll feel it through their actions.
They’ll be looking for ways to make your life easier, openly communicating with you, taking the time to listen, and making you a priority in their life.
Feelingvalued will be different for everyone — take some time to define the things that are truly important to you from a partner, and then ask yourself if you’re getting your needs met.
Someone who really values you will make sure that you never feel unappreciated or taken for granted. Different than making you feel valued, feeling attractive touches on (no pun intended) a different level.
Physical attraction and intimacy is abig part of a relationship.I understand that not everyone’s personality is all touchy-feely, but being in a relationship is not just aboutyourneeds, it is about being sensitive to those ofyour partneras well.
If your partner doesn’t act like they’re attracted to you, it’s easy to slip into a cycle of self-doubt. The right relationship will enjoy a healthy level of emotional and physical intimacy which serves as a safeguard against these insecurities. A relationship that lacks connection is an open field for a wandering mind.
We all have our own quirks, nuances, and idiosyncrasies — some of which have made it challenging to feel accepted in the past. Perhaps we feel different than everyone else (Good!) or we’ve had partners who’ve not accepted pieces of us that we cannot change.
When you’re in therightrelationship with therightperson, they’ll accept and embrace those flaws because they’re part of the person who they love.
We don’t have tolikeeverything about someone in order tolovethem as a whole individual — but wedohave toacceptwho they really are. Otherwise, we are being set up for failure.
As a human you have boundaries, standards, wants, and needs. The person you choose as an intimate partner has a responsibility for respecting you as you are, and all that comes along with you.
This means not crossing any lines, making you feel guilty or uncomfortable for your choices, valuing your opinion, and respecting when you say yes or no.
It’snotabout unconditional support if you’re doing something harmful or unethical — let’s make that clear. But itisabout operating within the lines of your personal choices because they love and respect you.
There should be absolutelyzeroreason that you ever feel nervous, scared, or intimidated by your significant other. If they ever use abusive or discouraging language towards you, this is a huge red flag that should never be ignored.
And if theyeverget violent or physical towards you, walk out the door immediately. Safety isn’t just physical — it’s also emotional. You’ll feel safe opening up to them, sharing secrets, fears, and desires. You’ll feel safe knowing that they support you and care for you — and you’ll never be left questioning their intentions.
Do you have a desire to always be talking about your partner or bringing them around your family and friends to show everyone how great they are? Do you feel truly lucky to have this person in your life?
You should be proud of who they are as a person, and also of who you are when you’re with them. It must be reciprocal — life is too short to be with someone who’s not proud to have you.
A clear sign of a healthy relationship is when the simple presence of this person in your life makes you want to become the best version of yourself.
They’ll be pursuing their own ambitions, working on improving themselves, chasing after goals and dreams. They’ll inspire you to level up because their energy is so contagious that it helps to renew your energy and re-spark the fire inside of you.
If someone drains your energy and happiness rather than adding to it, it’s time to re-evaluate why you’re with them.
What is it that you want to do in your life?
Do you want to start your own business? Go back to school for that degree you never got? Enter a fitness competition?
Whatever it is that your passions are, your significant other should be cheering you on and encouraging you. Being with someone who doubts your abilities or talent will infiltrate your mind and begin making you doubt yourself.
What’s more — if someoneovertlydiscourages you or criticizes you, it is a red flag of emotional abuse or control because they’re trying to hold you back to minimize the risk of losing you.
If there is one person you should absolutely be able to be your uncensored self around, it is your significant other. No acts, no games, no facades. Just the real version of you, and the real version of them.
The happiest couples are the ones who can open up and be honest with each other — and that honesty comes from the comfort knowing they will never be judged for who they are.
There is a difference between feeling like someone’sbestoption, and feeling like theironlyoption. They’ll never make you question how they feel, or the security of the future they see alongside of you.
And — you’ll feel equally as certain about them. You’ll look far down the road of your life and still see them by your side, growing and evolving together.
You’ll be excited about creating new memories, traditions, and experiences together. Despite the challenges of the past, despite the time spent with all of the wrong people, despite all of the heartbreak and suffering — you’ll ultimately feel that none of your previous relationships were a waste of time, they were simply preparing you for the right one that has come along…CONTINUE READING>>
